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Seriously toning it down

  • Published at 05:56 pm August 19th, 2016
  • Last updated at 06:07 pm August 19th, 2016
Seriously toning it down

How many of you have seen the film exorcist?

You know, the film where a little girl gets possessed by a demon and a priest helps to get the demon out of the girl.

Frankly, I think he did a terrible job, because the demon “Pazuzu” was back for revenge in the sequels.

I believe our society has demons too. They’re called corporations.

It’s corporations that come out with fairness products. Then take it to thousands of women in our country AND GIVE THEM A SELF IMAGE ISSUE.

Let’s think about it, what are these fairness products. Have you seen their adverts? Dark girl uses fairness cream, gets a job, gets a guy, etc. They’ve got these so called dark women as brand ambassadors, who if anything at all, need a tan, more than anything else.

Basically this is what the adverts are trying to tell our women: “Hello there average Bangladeshi woman. We know you’re brown because your skin produces a LOT OF MELANIN. But we’ll tell you that you’re dark, ugly, will never get a guy, never get a job, use this cream.

If that cream doesn’t work out for you, here’s another cream FOR FAIRER UNDERARMS. Because every girl steps outside her house thinking: “Today I am going to show off to the world my fair underarms. Then when I am at a party, guys at this party will be like: ‘Look at those fair underarms. I would totally date her!’ (His friend says) She’s dark though man. To which he responds with: ‘Who cares, she’s got fair underarms. It’s literally glowing.’”

Then let’s talk about families out there establishing this superficial need to be a certain type.

For example, we still have parents out there who tell their daughters: “Oh my god, you’re so fat, on top of that you’re so dark. Who’s going to marry you?”

To which you can’t help but question: “Well! I wonder whose DNA messed that up for me mom? You see you’re fat, I’m fat. Dad and you are brown, I’m brown. Collectively we’re fat and brown! So get off my back please!”

Now let’s talk about these wonderful things that a melaninised woman loves going to, called a dawaat (sarcasm here should be apparent).

Imagine this scenario!

You’re dressed in what you like and what you’re comfortable in, and you’re at a dawaat, you walk five clicks to the right and you hear: “Ai eita Dolly bhabir meye na, dekhso koto mota hoye gese.”

After hearing this you tell yourself ignorance is bliss, so you walk over to the left side.

Again you hear: “Ai eita Dolly bhabir meye na, or gayer rong eto moyla keno?” You know what I am talking about right. Because moyla aka trash apparently only looks brown and all shades are dark.

This is the point in this scene, where I come in to tell you: “Don’t ignore this!” Walk up to this woman and say what I bet you’ve always felt like saying but never did. Say: “Lady, the amount of make-up you have on your face, we could make a wedding cake with it because we all know a good cake needs a solid FOUNDATION." Following this, proceed to find yourself a cheese grater and grate their faces, in case they don’t believe you.

All I just want to tell you people is: a lot of what we have; the way we look, right down to body sizes is mostly genetic. No matter how hard we try to, we can’t ever go against that to achieve some magical form of beauty. However, there is something we CAN do. Eat healthy, exercise and maintain this genetic marvel of ours that is our body.

So let’s not fall prey to the tripe that society and the TV feeds us. And for that to happen, I suggest you start by refraining from watching TV. Haven’t watched TV in eight years and my life is definitely not fair and not lovely, but it’s unfair and mediocre. I am happy with it that way.

My rant here comes to an end and till next week I bid you all adieu: Arrividerci!