The holy month of repentance, deep reflections, and contemplation is upon us. It is not easy for one to let go of the vices and exercise control. But it becomes much harder when the thermometers are boiling due to the scorching heat.
We all try to do the best we can to restrain ourselves, however it is not uncommon to become easily agitated and the soaring temperatures and hunger aggravates the situation by many a folds.
We should not judge anyone on this matter. Because let's be honest, we have all been a victim of this sin. Be it bargaining with the shopkeepers, yelling at the rickshaw pullers, getting upset at unreasonable prices, or just cursing under our breath at the horrendous traffic on the narrow roads of the city, eventually we deeply regret those actions of ours.
Even though one cannot be fully blamed for not being able to control his or her anger, we, nevertheless, should not forget that in doing so, we are failing to fulfil the commitments that we made. People promise to themselves to stay away from the cardinal sins, but many of us unintentionally commit one by not being able to control sudden outbursts of anger and rage.
The Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) advised his followers not to become angry. “A strong person is not one who is able to wrestle others down but one who is able to control his anger,” said The Prophet.
It is true that we tend to take a lot of steps and say many things in the heat of the moment which we clearly do not mean at all. This does not necessarily make us bad people, but it also becomes pointless to contemplate, especially when it's too late. Hence we should try to control our temper to the best of our possibilities.
The best way of course would be self awareness. No one can guide us or control our emotions for us. We, who claim to be God’s greatest creations, and have been sent to this world with minds of our own, should take advantage of that. Think about the future consequences before you do something rash. If we can think and realise that our actions, when in anger will not lead to anything positive, then automatically our inner conscience will stop us from doing things that have unalterable consequences.
When in anger, always try not to reciprocate, even when the other person is being very rude. You either walk away from the situation, or talk to that person after both of you have calmed down. Rather than proving your point right away, the ideal thing would be to have some patience and to explain your opinions at a later date. This will not only help you, but also make the other person realise his mistakes. If worst comes to worst, it is better not to interact with that person or on the issue any more and do what we think is best for all.
One other solution to avoid getting angry at people or situation would be giving the other party the benefit of the doubt. This means that you should not take things personally, and should overlook and be open to discussion. We should put ourselves in other people’s shoes and try to consider their situation as well. Try not to consume yourself by thinking about the matter over and over again. But distract yourself with other work and activities that calms you down.
We always assume that we cannot control our emotions, however we forget that only we can control our emotions and feelings. We have to be strong and should not let the negative energy overwhelm us in any way.